Princess Jelly Bean and Escape to Sweethaven were among my first self-published titles. Yes, I wrote about fairy tale candy and a world full of animated pastries. The why of such a fixation is fodder for another post.
These stories were, after all, much more mature than an earlier manuscript entitled Snuggles’ Adventure. That naive tale simply told of my sister’s stuffed bear that was named after the face of the fabric softener of the day.
I have been writing in some form or fashion as long as I can remember. And my earliest dreams of future profession were that I would be a published writer. My favorite gadget for a few tween years was an old typewriter my dad gave me. Instead of pop culture magazines, I read writers’ and publishing guides. My competition of choice for a while was a good essay contest. And I have half-filled more journals in my day than I know to count.
Half-filled… because life happens. I am the queen of start and stop, distracted by other fun opportunities that crop up or the next glitzy idea. And I have in the past been a pro at holding back for the sake of image management – scared of what some might gossip, not ready for the eventual criticism or not wanting to publicly fail. These things have kept me from, among other, jumping into my own piece of virtual real estate on the road to learn if and how dreams might come true.
Motherhood is challenging me to face new-to-me depth of thought and conviction and find the words to express them. It is urging me to order my head and to practice my voice and to both document and model how I hope my children will live.
And so on the eve of the eve of my return to full-time work after having my second baby only twenty-three months after my first, I am launching this. Because that makes a lot of sense, doesn’t it? I don’t have enough demands and I have a surplus of spare time I am looking fill.
Or maybe it’s because the return to a new normal needs to include a space that is mine and only mine. And then in choosing to share what happens in that space, there will be an accountability for giving testimony to the blessings, the lessons, the journey to understand and to steward.
If to get anywhere that’s worth going you have to start somewhere, that is this for me.
This is my somewhere.